iNsAnE kIrBy ScHtUfF
by Abbot Timmo
Summary: Chibi Ice Dragon: UPDATE! FINALLY! I'm such a lazy person... CHAPTER 3: Video game moments and complete nonsense! Please reveiw!
1. War Against the Teletubbies

iNsAnE kIrBy ScHtUfF Chapter 1:the war against teletubbies  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own Kirby, or teletubbies, or Yoda, or tingle (THANK GOD!). So there. But I do own colorb and wattchamacallit.  
  
It was a beautiful day in dreamland. Kirby and king dedede were fighting, it was really really stormy, and all of king dedede's minions were out getting drunk off their asses. okay, so it wasn't so beautiful. any ways since I, the author, don't feel like writing a battle scene, I'll just say that king dedede gets his ass kicked.  
  
King dedede:(runs away)  
  
Kirby: finally, I beat him. time to go pig out! (Kirby runs off, only to run into two other creatures. the first one looked like Kirby, only he didn't have any arms or a mouth, and it was yellow and had 3 lightning bolt-shaped horns and had a wire with an electrical plug on the end for a tail. the second creature looked like an armless and legless Kirby also, but he had paint splotches covering his entire body, and had a pencil tail and a paintbrush and had 2 light blue paint splotches on the tips of his feet.)  
  
first creature: hey, watch where you're going!  
  
Kirby :who are you guys and where are you from?  
  
first creature: I'm wattchamacallit.  
  
second creature: and I'm colorb(as in color orb.)  
  
both: and we're here because the author put us here!  
  
Kirby: Author? wait a minute. you mean I'm in ANOTHER fic?!  
  
colorb: yes.  
  
Kirby: Is this author insane?  
  
wattchamacallit: yes.  
  
Kirby: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!  
  
wattchamacallit: Don't worry, the author is trapped behind the fourth wall, so he can't interact with this world physically.  
  
Kirby: Can I see?  
  
colorb: sure, come on. (so they went and they came upon a bubble-like wall with a very large snowball behind the wall)  
  
Colorb: Here we are.  
  
Kirby: Um..that wall looks very weak.  
  
Colorb: Don't worry, the wall won't break unless you mention something about the author, like "the author is very stupid"(suddenly realizes what he did) OH.CRAP. (the wall ripples and shatters, causing the snowball to roll down the hill at the trio. they dodge the snowball and it stops.  
  
K,W,&C: whew. (the snowball explodes, covering them in snow and revealing a creature that looks like ice dragon except it is very small, isn't as fat, doesn't have the jaggedy teeth things, and is blueish-green)  
  
Kirby: YOU'RE the author?!!  
  
Me: I am not JUST "the author"! I am (very loud echoey voice) CHIBI ICE DRAGON!!!(runs off)  
  
Wattchamacallit: great, now this fic is going to get insane. (scene change to king dedede's castle)  
  
King dedede: perfect. I can't defeat Kirby and neither can any monster.(gets into his chair and presses the button for the N.M.E screen to come up)  
  
King dedede: N.M.E guy, I none of your monsters can beat Kirby. I want the most powerfulest monster you have. most.powerfulest...  
  
N.M.E guy: I have a name you know. It's faggot.  
  
King dedede:(trying to hold in laughter) that's ..very nice...  
  
Faggot: there is a form you have to sign. (reading)the signer of this contract agrees to blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah...  
24 hours later. blah blah blah blah-  
  
king dedede: LISTEN, YOU LAWYER-LIKE PERSON!!!I WANT YOUR STRONGEST MONSTER RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!  
  
Faggot :okay,okay! (sends monster) (big zappity lightning affects)(the zappity stuff clears revealing... THE TELETUBBIES!!!(DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENGGGG!!!!!!!!*)  
  
King dedede: GAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!  
  
Teletubbies:(run off) (meanwhile....)  
  
Kirby: NICE GOING COLORB! NOW WE HAVE AN INSANE AUTHOR RUNNING  
  
ABOUT SPREADING CHAOS AROUND!!!  
  
Colorb: so loud.so loud.  
  
Me: (Beating Marx to death with a stick while riding a Bugzy) I'm not spreading chaos! (runs off and runs into a tree) THE PAIN!IT HURTS!  
  
Kirby: O_o  
  
wattchamacallit: Wait a minute. something's coming.  
  
Me: (speaking like yoda) InDEED, coming something is, mmmmmmmMMMMMMmmmmm.  
  
(suddenly, the teletubbies come over the hillside)  
  
Kirby: SHREEEEEIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Me: DIE TELETUBBIES!!!!(leaps at the teletubbies)KIKIKIKIKIKIKIKIYAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!  
  
Teletubbies: (throw bees at Me) bee bee! Bee bee!  
  
Me: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! (runs away from the bees at the speed of light while throwing icicles at the bees)  
  
bees: (die)  
  
Wattchamacallit: We have to help him!  
  
Kirby: why?  
  
Wattchamacallit: because the author is making us! (starts zapping teletubbies)  
  
Colorb: (draws an anvil above one of the teletubbie's heads) (anvil crashes down on teletubbie's head) MweHehEhEhehehehehehe!  
  
squashed teletubby: the pain! It hurts!  
  
Me: THAT'S MY LINE! (whacks teletubby with giant iron snowflake and starts whacking other teletubbies) SNOWFLAKE OF HELL! (a giant evil-grinning snowflake rises up from the ground and charges the teletubbies)  
  
Snowflake of hell: That will be $7463278975037419023842. what? you don't have any money? DIE! (Rams the teletubbies)**  
  
Kirby: (eats a teletubby and violently pukes up little telletubby bits)  
  
Colorb: (draws a gigantic hammer, which he uses to pound a teletubby into the ground) 2 remaining telletubbies: (throw a truckload of very annoying things at us) take that take that! Take that take that! we are in pain.  
  
Wattchamacallit spears a teletubby on his horns. we move in on the the remaining teletubby and kill it through very painful means. Just as it dies it throws the most satanic thing of all. it throws.TINGLE!  
  
K,W,&C: MY EYES!  
  
Me:(eyes glowing red) DIE SATAN! BEHOLD MY MOST POWERFUL ATTACK..CHAOTIC SNOWSTORM!!!!  
  
Suddenly, Tingle is bombarded with giant snowflakes, huge ice cubes, icicles, snowballs, and very cold wind. when the snowstorm clears(which took half an hour), Tingle is frozen, cut in half, and has icicle stab wounds all over his body. he then shatters in an explosion of ice and blood.  
  
Me: (evil grin)  
  
K,W,&C: O_O  
  
Me: I have been waiting SO LONG to do that! (chapter ends)  
  
*That's the sound from Monty Python and The Holy Grail that plays when the knights who go ni tell King Arthur and his knights of the round table to do something.  
  
** Get it? It looked like charge as in charge at people, but it was actually charge as in charge you money! C'mon, it's funny! LAUGH, dammit!  
  
I don't think that this chapter was funny as I wanted it to be. 


	2. Let the insanity begin!

iNsAnE KiRbY sChTuFF  
  
Chapter 2: LET THE INSANITY BEGIN!  
  
I'm so sorry that I took so long to update!  
  
Colorb: Whew. We finally got the fourth wall rebuilt!  
  
(Shows me trapped behind the wall. I stab the wall with a giant icicle. Nothing happens.)  
  
Me: (sulk)  
  
Kirby: So, now what do we do?  
  
Wattchamacallit: Lets burn Tingles remains!  
  
K&C: Yah!! (They start to burn Tingle)  
  
Me: (starts attacking the fourth wall furiously) I WANT TO BURN TINGLE!  
  
Kirby: sorry, no can do! (Roasts a piece of Tingle over the fire and eats it)  
  
Me: (Big sulk)  
  
4 hours later.  
  
They all are asleep. except Chibi ice dragon( that's me, in case you forgot), who is still attacking the wall.  
  
Me: *pant* looks like I'll have to rip off sonic the hedgehog.(curls into a ball and starts charging the spinny zoom attack) *VNVNVNNNNNNNNNN* (zooms at the wall and breaks through it, running over tingles ashes and Wattchamacallit)  
  
Wattchamacallit: OWWWWWW.  
  
K&C: (wake up) wha?  
  
wattchamacallit: Ow.  
  
K&C: Oh.  
  
Kirby: Hey, where's the author?  
  
Colorb: CRAP! HE ESCAPED!  
  
Kirby: Hey, look! Tracks!  
  
Wattchamacallit: (in a college persons voice) They appear to be made by something called a "spinny zoom attack".  
  
Colorb: O_o  
  
Kirby: O_o  
  
Wattchamacallit: (stares at confused faces) never mind. lets just see where the tracks lead, okay? Maybe we'll find the author.  
  
And so our "heroes" followed the tracks and found. Me, struggling to push down a ginormous switch. On the top it says "normal" and at the bottom it says "INSANE MODE!"  
  
Me: stupid switch keeping me from making the story go insane. DIE! (whacks the switch with the skull hammer from the wind waker. the switch starts to fall towards "INSANE MODE!")  
  
K,C,&W: (Hurl themselves at the switch)NNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.....  
  
Me: Not so fast, pumpkin bridges!(whacks them aside with BIS(big iron snowflake)  
  
The ginormous switch falls down and lands at "INSANE MODE!"  
  
Suddenly, the land turns into a big flashing place with big buildings and seizure inducing lights. A doll comes up and starts to sing. Also, her head starts to spin.  
  
Kirby: That doesn't seem too insane.  
  
The doll's head spins faster and faster and faster and faster and faster and BOOM it explodes!  
  
Kirby: O.o (runs away, only to run straight into jimmy neutron in a big battle mech. Jimmy starts running backwards at high speed)  
  
Kirby: (clings onto the mech for dear life as Jimmy zooms through a long twisting and spinning tunnel while knocking down stalactites with his hair. They finally come out of the tunnel in the Pokemon movie)  
  
Jimmy: MOOvie FALL in TWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.....  
  
(The Pokemon movie splits in half and falls over)  
  
Suddenly the screen goes black. A little metool walks out to the center of the screen.  
  
Metool: h3110, I 4m 1337/\/\4573r /\/\37001. (Translation: Hello, I am leetmaster metool.)  
  
Crowd: Leetmaster metool?  
  
Leetmaster metool: y34h, f00. I /\/0\/\/ bri/\/g j00 4 c0/\/\3rci41 ph0r. (Yeah, fool. I now bring you a commercial for.)  
  
Eskimo Bob  
starring Alfonzo!  
  
Don't Miss one episode in this series!  
(okay, so the first 16 suck, but the ones after them are great!)  
  
Episode 7: Eskimo bob takes a bath Episode 13: Wrath of the penguin Episode 15: The arctic food chain Episode 16: The ghost of the avalanche Episode 17: Look! A box! (make sure you click the box at the end) Episode 18: We're Irish! Episode 20: Happy Easter to all, and to all a good night! Episode 21: Follow the moon! Episode 22: How to cook a chicken's goose Episode 24: The importance of changing a pigeon's diaper Episode 25: We're bored Episode 26: Return of the girl Episode 27: A chimp in the jungle is worth two in the arctic Episode 28: Yuck's revenge Episode 30: How the fish stole Christmas from the island of misfit toys Episode 32: A goat in the hand is worth two in the bush Episode 33: City of snow  
  
AND DON'T MISS.  
  
EPISODE 29  
THE OVERTURE  
  
Leetmaster metool: 7h4/\/I j00. (thank you.)*walks away*  
  
(The screen fades back to the part where we left off.)  
  
Kirby: (jumps out from the collapsed movie) I gotta get out of here! (gets hit in the head by a flying pink ferret muffin) OOF!  
  
Kirby runs off to. well, know where in particular. Anyway as Kirby is running, he nearly gets hit by a big purple blob that zoomed into the sky! The blob turns into a purple 3-eyed smiley face which then zooms down at Kirby. Suddenly, as it's about to hit, a giant pair of hands grab it and drop it in a trash can. This repeats a while until 5 PTESFs(purple three- eye faces)come down and get slapped away. This triggers a stampede of PTESFs to come down and start attacking the hands, which then start punching them madly.  
  
Kirby: For some reason, I feel a need to help them...  
  
Colorb: Kirby! There you are! I was.(notices PTESFs)(eyes shrink and turn red) PURPLE SMILEYS! MUST KILL PURPLE SMILEYS! THEY WILL PAY FOR WHAT THEY DID IN THE TOILET TUBE!  
  
~*fLaShBaCk!~*  
  
(the scene shows colorb as a little kid. He is a lot smaller, and isn't covered in paint splotches. He is sitting in the living room of his house (I'm not describing it because I'm lazy) painting. He is painting purple three-eyed smiley faces( I'll just call them Psmileys). They each plop to the ground and look up at him. Then.)  
  
Psmileys: (Baring sharp pointy teeth) grrrrrrrrrr.  
  
Colorb: Oh crud! (jumps up and runs away. The Psmileys chase after him.)  
  
Colorb is chased all over the house, the evil smileys destroying every in their path. He eventually jumps into the toilet to hide. The smileys flush the toilet, then jump in after him. They all get washed down.  
  
(scene change to inside the pipes. Colorb and all the smileys are all zooming down the pipeline.)  
  
Colorb: Crap, they're gaining!(the smileys catch colorb and start biting him) Aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!  
  
(scene change to Wattchamacallit's house. Wattchamacallit as a kid is washing his horn.(yes, as a kid he has only one horn.) Suddenly, Colorb and the Psmileys erupt out of the faucet.)  
  
Wattchamacallit: Whoa!  
  
Colorb: (Cowering in corner as Psmileys close in on him) KILL THE SMILEYS! KILL THEM!  
  
Wattchamacallit: Okay! (Electricity shoots out of his electrical plug tail and zaps the Psmileys. They turn rainbow-colored, swell up and explode, spraying rainbow-colored paint everywhere)  
  
Colorb: (covered in paint) THANK YOU! Wattchamacallit: Come on, let's get that paint off you.  
  
Narrarator: And so, W&C tried to get the paint off Colorb. However, the paint WOULDN'T COME OFF!  
  
Wattchamacallit: Ah well. Come on, lets get you back to your house. (they go outside and over to Colorb's house and see Colorb's mom and dad talking to a carpenter person)  
  
Carpenter: Okay, your house is all fixed up.  
  
Colorb's mom: Thank you!  
  
Carpenter: Oh, and here's the cost. (hands them a piece of paper)  
  
Colorb's dad: Okay, lets see here-WHA?! $333,666,084?!  
  
Colorb's mom: We don't have that kind of money!  
  
Carpenter: Too bad! You'll just have to live on the streets.(disappears)  
  
(Colorb's house suddenly explodes, and his mom and dad get dragged off by wolves)  
  
~*fLaShBaCk EnDs!*~  
  
Colorb: Because of them, I had to live out on the streets. THEY SHALL PAY! GWAAARRRRGG!!!!!!( starts viciously attacking Psmileys with a laser gun he drew up)KIRBY! HELP ME SMITE THY ENEMIES!  
  
Kirby: Meh, okay. (starts using his MEGA ASSKICKING SUPLEX SKILLS to combat the smileys)  
  
Narrarator: And so, the enraged Colorb and a slightly freaked out Kirby smote the Psmileys until the cows came home and got speared by Leetmaster Metool. Much later. Kirby and Colorb were walking along when suddenly, Colorb disappeared and was replaced by Wattchamacallit. Kirby: (eats a muffin that appeared out of nowhere) Wattchamacallit? What are you doing here?  
  
Wattchamacallit: Chibi ice dragon thought I wasn't getting enough lines.  
  
Narrarator: Suddenly, the Eye of Sauron appeared.  
  
Eye of Sauron: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! I WILL RULE YOU ALL!  
  
Master Hand:(comes flying in and pokes the Eye of Sauron)  
  
Eye of Sauron: OW! (gets poked again) Mommy!! (runs away)  
  
Master Hand: Mwehehehehehehehe! (chases after the Eye of Sauron, poking it all the way.  
  
Kirby: Okay.  
  
Narrarator: And so, after Colorb rejoined Kirby, and many more insane things happening, Kirby and Co. finally found Chibi Ice Dragon.  
  
Me: (Riding a giant squirrel) Wahoo! (giant squirrel disappears) Wha? (the city of insanity begins to disappear) Noooo! My insane place! It's time to insert the really insane thing! (a big internet screen comes up. I type in ting there looking freaked out. Also, their eyes are a lot bigger than usual.  
  
Kirby: WHOA. Colorb: THAT was scary.  
  
Wattchamacallit: I think I just lost 30 IQ points.  
  
Me: I'll be back! (runs off into the sunset)  
  
Me: I think that turned out pretty good!  
  
Audience: Despite being about A MONTH LATE!  
  
Lawyers: Prepare to have the CRAP SUED OUT OF YOU!  
  
Me: Not if I can stop it! I do not own the webpage I told people to go to, Lord of the Rings, Super Smash Bros., Kirby, Eskimo Bob, Jimmy Neutron, The Pokemon movie, or Sonic the hedgehog.*pant,pant,pant*  
  
Lawyers: NOoOooOOOOoooOOOoOO.(shrivel up and die)  
  
Me: O_o 


	3. Video game moments and insanity!

Chapter 3: Video game moments  
  
GYAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!! I COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT THIS FIC!!!! I AM NOT WWOOOOOOOORRRRRRRTTTTTTTTTTHHHHHHHHHYYYYYYYYYY!!!! (head explodes) Kirby: (sweatdrop) Disclaimer: I do not own any of the games in this chapter. DUR!  
  
GAME: WIND WAKER SCENE: FORSAKEN FORTESS/2ND FLOOR OUTSIDE  
  
(Two barrels are making there way past the Moblin guard to the last staircase. Inside one barrel is me, Chibi ice dragon. Inside the other is a Dark Furret. His name is Ferahgo. He's the person I'm sharing this account with.)  
  
Me: (whispering)okay, he's about to look your way. Stop moving.  
  
Ferahgo: (takes off the barrel and runs towards the staircase.  
  
Me: YOU IDIOT!  
  
Moblin: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
(Ferahgo, using his slinky stealthy Furret skills, gets to the staircase without being noticed and runs up. As for me.)  
  
Moblin: (Breaks the barrel I'm hiding under)  
  
Me: Oh crap.  
  
Moblin: ( trumpets an alarm. The Helmaroc King comes flying down and grabs me. He then throws me out to sea.)  
  
Time for a.  
  
SCENE CHANGE! (FLASHING LIGHTS)  
To Northern Fairy Island (shows Northern Fairy Island. All is normal until.)  
  
Me: (falls out of the sky) AAAAAAaaaAaaaAAaaAAAAA!!! (slams into the Giant shell, breaking through the top and leaving a neat Chibi ice dragon shaped hole.)  
  
Blue ChuChu: ?  
  
GAME: OCARINA OF TIME PLACE: LON LON RANCH(NIGHTTIME)  
  
Young Link is wandering around Lon Lon ranch killing golden skulltulas, when suddenly, a Guay spots him! (Leetmaster Metool: \/\/h47'5 4 Gu4y?(translation: what's a Guay?) Me: A Guay is one of those stupid crow things from Oot.)  
  
Guay: Heh heh. WARP FACTOR 84! (starts going REALLY fast and dives at Link. He's about to hit and. he hits!)  
  
*WHAM!*  
  
Link: (Totally unhurt) Huh? (looks behind him and sees the Guay slammed into his Hylian shield) .weird.  
  
Me: OKAY, THAT'S IT!  
  
Kirby: What?  
  
Me: I never really thought this chapter out. So since I can't think of anything else to do, I'm going to do this. (Takes a deep breath)  
  
Leetmaster Metool: (Dashes by with a siren on top his helmet blaring) \/\/4R/\/1/\/G! \/\/4R/\/1/\/G! 7074L 1/\/54/\/17Y 4L3R7! (Translation: WARNING! WARNING! TOTAL INSANITY ALERT!)  
  
Me: (With spirally eyes) The world has changed I fear they can no longer do him but I feel it in the ladies if nice smelling in the editing and much petulance will is a smell lost in it for none now Leon who remember it's a great big gigantic pal and pal to all Pal hole if it at seeing that old dumb but you and it at it in the wilderness she is the big and longer to do it but I fear the ladies he gave nice and only in the at and much potential wind rolled into the smell lost it for none now and Leon who remember it's a great big gigantic pal in a pal to all passed to a if it had seen the old home .two and it added in the wilderness CC is big and longer to do it but I fear the he is a room and if regulating to give nice and only in the at and much potential wind rolled into the smell lost it for none now and lay on your remember to make the at and pal it in a pal to all passed to a give it had been seen the anode old them to end it added in the wilderness CC is big and longer to do but feared the 30th group at the end of regulating to give nice and only in the at and much potential wind rolled into the smell lost for eight none now and lay on your remember if it to make the at and pal aged up a into the back of the dictate had been seen the anode old them to end it in the little end and it added in the wilderness CC is big and longer to do but feared the 30th group of regulating the give nice and only in the at and much potential wind rolled into the smell lost for eight.it up at and lay on your remember if it to make the at and pal aged up in and he ate it had been seen the Endo told them to fear it in the little end it added added in the wilderness CC is big and longer to do but fear the 30th group of regulating the give nice and only in the act and much potential wind rolled into the smell lost for eight it up and lay or your remember hanging it is it to make beef and the room with his or your remember hanging it isn't it into basic beef and the room with Bob then ate her and in a fit forgot to save this visit Mr. nothing ever.  
  
Everyone in Dreamland: O_O (sweatdrop)  
  
Me: And with that, I end this chapter. I'm so so sorry I was so lazy! I'll try to update more often, I swear!  
  
(cricket chirps)  
  
Me: T_T You never really cared whether I updated or not, did you?  
  
The audience nods.  
  
Me:(turns and starts to walk away) Oh well, I understand that (Whips back around and attacks the audience with a giant iron snowflake)DIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEE!  
  
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW! 


End file.
